I Forgot More Than You'll Ever Know

Had to go with a Dylan title this time as he's been on heavy rotation. School has been rough lately, and in this fire-hose type education, there is a fear that:

a) I'll never learn everything I need for every new test
b) Supposing I accomplish a), that I won't be able to recall it when my rotations start

Hence the blog title -- I almost went with "Idiot Wind" -- it was kind of a toss-up. If you couldn't guess by now, I'm a big fan of self-deprecating humor. I figure no matter how bad things get, you should always look for the funny side of things, even in yourself.

On that note, my performance on the last round of tests have provided some classic facepalm moments. Below are some recreations of me checking my test scores online:









I'm still hanging in there though -- I don't know if it will get any easier.
But there is one thing I DO know -- my primitive brain is being pushed to its capacity. After all, I'm just a simple caveman.

The TB is Whippin' Me

No, I don't actually have tuberculosis, or "the consumption" as it was known back in the day when Doc Holliday died from it. However, it was the topic of one of our recent pulmonary lectures, and in my recent corny attempt to name all of my posts after relevant song titles, this one fit the bill. The song actually goes back quite a way to country legend Ernest Tubb (probably best known for "Walkin' the Floor Over You"). At any rate, I first heard this tune from my favorite Chicago band, Wilco. Their cover version, done with Syd Straw) was actually their 1st single. They have gotten quite a bit less twangy since then, but the song has some great Tele licks -- check it out here if you haven't heard it: streaming version of Wilco's "The TB is Whippin' Me" (click on the link and then look at the bottom of the page to see their integrated media player -- a bit hard to find if you've never been to this site before -- hit the little triangle symbol in the very bottom left to play).

This is my 1st post of 2009 -- had a nice Christmas break with the family and now it's back to the books. Hopefully I can get back to some regular posting, but then again, I seem to say that on every post eh?

We have had some fun times in our Therapeutic Skills lab as of late. The last 2 sessions have included giving/receiving shots (sub-Q, IM, & ID) to eachother, as well as venipuncture/blood draws and starting IV's. Since I actually like the blood & guts of medicine this was no problem for me and I actually enjoyed it. And luckily I was able to remain calm and prevent a hulkout.
(I'm sure you all remember this infamous hulkout from old TV series with Bill Bixby: Receiving a lethal injection, and then having the person say, "Oh. I just gave you a lethal injection. Sorry, David.")

In honor of that stupendous TV series, here are some more classic, and frankly, hilarious hulkout moments that actually occurred (courtesy of this webpage). It must have been quite a challenge for the writers to find new and inventive ways to make David *really angry* every episode, and as you can see below, the thinktank well often ran dry.

How to provoke a Hulkout:

Dealing with a pesky operator in a phone booth ("I DON'T HAVE TWENTY-FIVE CENTS!!!")



Being stuck in a cab in New York rush hour traffic - "You don't understand, I have to be there by 4:00!" - "Hey, mac, it's rush hour, we ain't gettin' there til five, so relax." - "BUT I HAVE TO BE THERE BY FOUR!!!"

Being tied up and fed soup by an elderly Japanese woman who doesn't understand words like "You've GOT to cut me loose!"

Falling through a rickety staircase while trying to get to the drunk girl who is about to jump off the roof, and then finding that she's locked the rooftop door

Being placed in a dumpster by the two garbagemen who think he's a thief, and who don't believe him when he says "Hey! There are rats in here!", and then being bitten by the rats to add injury to insult

Getting his jacket caught in the printwheels at the newspaper printing room, and then inexplicably sticking his hand into the rollers

Having a large wooden beam fall on him, and then having a heavy boulder fall on the beam

Falling into the churning water of a boathouse, and then inexplicably being repeatedly carried over the paddlewheel

Having his friend tell the New York "syndicate" that David has their money, so that their enforcers chase David back to his apartment, and then having all his neighbors close their doors on him rather than listen to him saying "Please! You've GOT to let me in!!!", and then being beaten up and thrown over the balcony into the smelly trash cans by same enforcers

Helping Ray Walston out with a magic trick by allowing himself to be chained up and put in a tank of water, only to find that drunk Ray has forgotten to leave the escape key inside the tank

Locked in a drunk tank with a crazy person who insists he is Ernest Hemingway and then beats the stuffing out of David

Somehow getting himself into a belfry and then realizing that a bell is there, just as it strikes the hour

Being put in a strait jacket because he's seen the videotape that proves that the sanatarium doctor is performing unnecessary lobotomies on the patients, and then thrashing around so much that he bangs his head on the floor

Wandering into an Army dump to get the deadly canister of army nerve gas that has blinded his friend, only to be caught by a mean MP who knocks his gas mask off and throws him back down the hill, knocking the canister open so that David can frantically try to put his mask back on before looking up to see that the MP has somehow brought in a crane and is dumping two tons of garbage on him

Trying to run away from the nasty prison work camp, only to fall through a rotted bridge, and then being bitten by a rattlesnake

Beaten up by all the other prisoners in the work camp, in the middle of the night while he is trying to sleep, when he emphatically told them not to beat him up that particular night

Making the High Priest of the Baba Yaga voodoo cult so angry with him by challenging a perfectly normal ritual sacrifice that several of the Priest's minions are obliged to beat the stuffing out of David and throw a cloak over his head

Being mistaken for mob boss Mike Cassidy, who looks exactly like him, and who everybody wants to beat up, so that David is repeatedly beaten up for no reason

Beaten up while trying to keep the incoherent man from stabbing the woman who accidentally locked David in the closet, and then having same man attempt to close the door to same closet on David's head

Being hit by a car and knocked twenty feet so that he tumbles down a conveniently open manhole

Coming to the aid of the gumshoe in the garage who is being beaten up for not minding HIS own business, and getting beaten up himself, kicked under a low riding sportscar that has been jacked up for repairs, and whose jack is removed so that the car can fall on David. Gumshoe's reaction, in voiceover narration: "It was a big green thing, and it definitely wasn't happy about something."

Being caught at the old studio backlot with same gumshoe, by same nasty bad guys, and trying to run away so as not to get angry with them, only to have them pull a heavy old scene facade down on top of him. Gumshoe's reaction: "It was that green thing again, and it still wasn't happy."

Having several clay pots broken over his head in the middle of the now-burning room (why is the room always burning?), and then knocking an entire case of same clay pots onto same head, and then, while lying very still and struggling not to get angry, having his pants catch fire

While paralyzed for the episode, somehow getting caught in the middle of a barroom brawl, and while trying to quietly wheel himself out of the room, being hit by a flying body and knocked down the stairs (what David is even doing in such a situation goes unexplained)

While still paralyzed, trying to drive a car to the bank to stop his friend for the episode (who is going to try to obtain an immediate loan by robbing the bank), only to drive so slowly that the big guy in the truck behind him keeps yelling "Hurry up! Learn to drive!", and then getting so caught up in watching his friend wheel into the bank that he forgets to look both ways before entering the intersection, crashes into a car trying to cross in front of him, and gets rear-ended by the big guy in the truck, who remarks as David begins turning into the Hulk: "You IDIOT!!"

And I'll leave you all with the infamous "tire change" hulkout, which incidentally was the very first TV series hulkout: